"What is it that you do?"

How I answer this is ALWAYS deepening and evolving. Not just the how I verbally answer that question, but the evolution of how it is expressed through me! I, myself, am in a constant state of healing, learning, growing, deepening, expanding and evolving.

While it is easiest to have the title of "Sex+Intimacy Coach", I am not really "coaching". To me, that assumes "performance", which is exactly what we are moving away from! So perhaps it is more accurate to use "mentorship" or "guidance". My intention is to guide you to your own inherent and innate wisdom. I have no "answers" to provide you, but we can explore deeper questions together!

I would also say I am a "space-holder". A space where ALL OF YOU IS WELCOME. A shame-free, judgement-free space. A space "safe enough" to gently invite to your growth edges and courageously consider the next "small, doable piece" that may increase your Window of Presence"! Space to be seen, heard, felt and understood. A space to tenderly hold all the various parts and aspects of YOU!

The space I hold can be virtual/remote...or it may be in-person/direct-experience. And "direct-experience" does not alway mean hands-on. But it is always "somatic", embodied, experiential, and at a pace that your body is able to digest and integrate. The scope of my practice may also include pleasure and genitals. Our work together is a continued practice of Mapping and Tracking. Scar tissue remediation may address physical scars and adhesions, and we will also be renegotiating scars on the level of the psyche/energetic/subtle body.

And we are still just scratching the surface! (See why it can be difficult to explain what I do, or what a session looks like?) Below I have tried to convey some more aspects of our work/exploration together:
STATES/STAGES of Sexuality: Resting, Healing, Curious, Adventurous, Transformational (credit to Jaiya!)
  • While they can be considered "stages", there is no hierarchy here, and we can be flowing through different ones even within a week! Which stage do you think you may currently be experiencing?
4 OBSTACLES and PATHWAYS to Healing: Bio-Mechanical, Bio-Chemical, Emotional/Existential, and Scar Tissue
SCAR TISSUE: Always considering the "seen" (physical) aspects and the "unseen" aspects. What is Moving vs. What is Not Moving?
  • Remediation of external scars and adhesions, as well as re-negotiation of the "scars" of the psyche, the energetic/subtle body, and those of an existential nature.
TRAUMA: Something that necessitates an emotional/mental/physical coping reaction/response. It is not WHAT happened in the past, it relates to your INTERNALIZED experience and response, or lack of response.
  • Acute and chronic lived events that overwhelmed our nervous system. Developmental, relational, attachment, inter-generational/ancestral, cultural and collective. Boundary violations.
NERVOUS SYSTEM: Body security system. Safety. Window of Tolerance/Presence. Looking at Defense Mechanisms.
HABITS/PATTERNS/CONDITIONING: Again, on all layers and levels. Tension patterns. Fear-based patterns. Conscious and unconscious patterns. Habitual reactions and protective mechanisms.
Foundation of Betty Martin's WHEEL OF CONSENT: Who is the touch for? Learn to notice what  you do and don't want, to trust it, to honor it, and to learn to communicate it! Empowered voice and choice!
Theories of ATTACHMENT/BONDING:
PARTS/ESSENTIAL SELF:
Jaiya's EROTIC BLUEPRINTS™: What is your unique wiring for turn-on and eroticism?
  • The 5 Erotic Blueprint™ Types: Energetic, Sensual, Sexual, Kinky and Shapeshifter
What are your BRAKES & ACCELERATORS when it comes to sexual aliveness and turn-on?
MAPPING & TRACKING: Mapping territory and terrain. State and story. The "seen" and "unseen". Basically, taking a look and tracking ALL OF THE ABOVE mentioned! This can happen remotely/virtually, or in-person. It may look like bodywork, or there may be no touch at all! We could be mapping your nervous system, mapping a timeline, mapping tension in your body,  mapping your Erotic Blueprint™, mapping your genitals, mapping your pathways to arousal...the list goes on! 
TRUTH/ORIGINAL BLUEPRINT OF HEALTH/ESSENCE: This is innate wisdom of the body that expands to/within all dimensions.
  • What is Self? What is not Self? What is an imprint? What is of your Blueprint of Health?
PERMISSION: For Pleasure! Aliveness! Joy!

So...."What do I do"?
​In short, I create a space where it is "SAFE TO BE YOU!"